Tuesday, July 27, 2010

I Choose Me

I was reading an interview with the queer musician Enio, and the interviewer asks if "finding someone" has affected his music. Enio then goes on to describe the magic of meeting his partner in 2008, and how this rescues him from what we assume to be the perpetual loneliness of being an indie musician.

These kinds of interviews always annoy me, especially when they come from mainstream LGBT publications like the advocate. For starers, although I often link to the Advocate, they've always catered more to the cultural leanings of white gay men than to any other readers. They do report on stories that are significant to the lives of transgendered people, lesbians, and questioning folks (although I almost never see any mention of intersexuality or genderQueer-identifying lives and life-modes). What annoys me, though, is not the breadth of their coverage--I'm thankful that they exist at all as an LGBT publication--but the often saccharine tone of their interviewers. "And what was it like when you found...the one?"

How is an indie musician supposed to connect with queer kids when all he can talk about is how the transformative power of same-sex love has changed his life? As a listener, I'd be much more interested in hearing about how LGBT musicians can reach a wide variety of audiences, and how they manage homophobia within and outside of the music industry. I don't need to hear about how I'll feel a lot better once I settle down with someone.

Artists, both queer and straight, should recognize that being single does not mean being alone. It can be a pleasant position, and for some, singlehood is an entirely closed circuit which neither needs nor desires outside interference. I'd like to hear more artists talking about their friends, family, and supporters, rather than "the one" who finally changed their outlook on life. What was wrong with their music and attiude before they entered into same-sex cohabitation? Why is one state more artistically satisfying than the other?

Also, pets. Doesn't anyone have pets anymore? My cat helps me all the time when I'm writing, primarily by sitting on the keyboard.

I've chosen a picture of Samantha Jones in honor of the fact that she chooses to have a relationship with herself. Concentrate on this, and not SATC 2, which is an awful, vapid joke on the state of women and men, both gay and straight.

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